As a spirits writer and judge who tastes thousands of expressions per year, I generally don’t care for bottled or canned ready-to-drink cocktails. They're often too sweet, fruity, or watered down, and pretty much bear no similarity to the real thing. That being said, Gold Fashioned is a high-end exception to my somewhat flexible rule, and the Via Carota RTD lineup is also pretty good. But what about a machine that acts as your personal bartender and can make a cocktail for you with the push of a button?
Bartesian is exactly that: a Nespresso-style cocktail machine that doesn’t require mixology skills. You only need to supply the booze, as the company offers coffee pod-style capsules to make virtually any drink you can think of, from an old fashioned to a Manhattan, a martini to a cosmopolitan, or a mai tai to a zombie.
I’m not a drinks snob by any means. But I definitely doubted how good Bartesian's drinks would actually be. I approached the task of sampling these cocktails with an open mind—and truth is, the results are a mixed bag.
There are two main models: the larger and more expensive Bartesian and the smaller and cheaper Duet. There’s also a Professional version that is marketed towards businesses.
I tested out the regular Bartesian, which has four glass canisters to fill with liquor. I went with Brother’s Bond bourbon, Myers's rum, Loca Loka blanco tequila, and Painted Sky vodka. Bartesian has various cocktail pod collections to choose from, so I went with Whiskey Lovers, Rum Lovers, and—somewhat trepidatiously—the Tropical Margarita Collection.
Jonah Flicker
Operating the machine is simple. I just opened the top, popped in a pod, closed it, chose the strength of my drink (ranging from strong to non-alcoholic), and hit start on the touchscreen. The machine intuitively knows which cocktail it's making and which spirit to use based on the capsule you’ve inserted. The screen tells you what type of glass to put under the spout and which type of ice to use, and the boozy mixture comes out in a measured pour.
There were highlights and lowlights depending on the drink, but I'll start on a positive note. The old fashioned was a totally serviceable version of the classic drink, with some citrus and sweet notes that played nicely against the bourbon’s vanilla and oak character. The classic margarita was also a decent pour—though perhaps a bit on the sweet side and slightly watered down—but as good as many restaurant margaritas I’ve had. The Mai Tai was commendable as well, if a bit sweet, but the tropical fruit flavors didn't taste artificial and the rum shone through.
Moving onto the failures. I didn't like the Manhattan. Bartesian's version of this drink, one of my favorites, tasted like fake cherry, as if someone poured artificial maraschino juice into a glass of whiskey. The blackberry margarita was also, as I suspected, incredibly sweet, and kind of reminded me of a liquid Jolly Rancher. And the painkiller had strong nutmeg notes that overpowered the rum.
Jonah Flicker
It’s worth considering just who Bartesian is for, however. It's not a machine for spirits and cocktail aficionados who, when making Manhattans, choose the finest bitters and vermouth, meticulously stir exactly 40 times in a mixing glass to achieve perfect dilution and temperature, and garnish with expensive Italian cherries. Bartesian is for those who don't have the time, interest, or space to curate a home bar with high-end spirits and cocktail components.
Of course, you do need to purchase the booze in order to use this machine, and naturally, the drinks will be better if you use higher quality liquor. That being said, you could get away with cheap bourbon or budget tequila here and still have something that's totally drinkable, if perhaps unremarkable. It’s worth noting that Bartesian requires ample counter space, which could be an issue in small apartments.
The regular Bartesian and smaller duet are on sale now for $300 and $200, respectively. The cocktail capsule kits range from variety packs of eight for $25 to subscription services at various price points.
Bottom line: Bartesian is going to provide decent drinks at its best and some that're sweeter than candy at its worst. But if you’re looking for an easy way to enjoy an old fashioned or whiskey sour at the end of a long day without having to do much work, it might be the machine for you.
Related: We've Tried Hundreds of Whiskey Cocktails. Our 14 Favorite Recipes Are Simple and Delicious
from Men's Journal https://ift.tt/wQsgbal
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